


Bunk beds

by jellybeany



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: A Really Really Annoying Roommate, Bunkbeds, Getting Together, M/M, pig latin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-11
Updated: 2018-06-11
Packaged: 2019-05-21 00:22:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14904980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jellybeany/pseuds/jellybeany
Summary: “If you’re crushing on Coach Hall, I change my mind, don’t go for it. Or,” he said, pinching Will at the waist and leaning away as Will tried to poke his eyes out, “Do hit on him, but make sure Ransom and Holster are around to film it.”





	Bunk beds

**Author's Note:**

> Something short and sweet for you! Warning: contains no hockey whatsoever.   
> I always pictured Will being the top… bunk. But I thought it'd be funny to have Nursey hanging over the side.   
> I slept in (and fell out of) bunkbeds a lot as a kid, so this was fun to write.

“Not this again.” Will crushed his face further into the pillow, muffling his groans only slightly.

 

At the last kegster it had been revealed, in a drinking game that Will had no memory of thanks to alcohol induced amnesia, that he had a ‘crush’ on someone at Samwell. Crush. What a mortifying word. He wasn’t some lovesick sixteen year old. He was nineteen. Nineteen was practically adult, and very mature.

 

“Okay, okay, I’ll stop. Just promise me one thing?”

 

Dex lifted his head from the pillow to squint warily at the head hanging over the top bunk and the cloud of gravity defying hair surrounding it. 

 

“What’s that?”

 

“Promise me you’ll ask her out. Or tell me her name, and I’ll ask her out for you.”

 

It was too dark for Derek to see Will’s eyes rolling, but he probably sensed it somehow. Fielding questions about this supposed crush had become a nighttime routine. It gave each night the atmosphere of a teenage sleepover, though Will liked to think he was above such things.

 

However, he knew Derek was like a dog with a bone when it came to secrets — he would not let go. He thought it would be safer to give him a clue, lest he begin intimidation tactics. Will had seen many a good man fall from being subjected to Shitty’s prime method of interrogation. That is to say, ruthless tickling. 

 

“Her name is,” Will looked across the room, searching in the darkness for some kind of aid. His gaze landed on a videogame case that had fallen from the bookcase onto a pile of unforgivably dirty laundry. “Zelda.”

 

“Pshhh. Who are you then, George Glass?” The wood creaked as Derek lay back down in the top bunk and fidgeted.

 

“Nurse, will you just drop it?”

 

“Okay Dex, I’ll drop it. For now…”

 

The pillow did it’s best to muffle Will’s string of curse words, but it couldn’t hide all of them. 

 

* * *

 

“How’s Zelda?” asked Derek, the minute Will slipped under the covers.

 

He considered playing along, but this might give Derek the impression that Zelda was real. And this thought, if followed to its logical conclusion, would result in Derek trespassing into Will’s classes and approaching innocent (and highly impressionable) female students. Will decided to go with the truth, albeit with significant omissions.

 

“Look, it’s not as simple as you think. There are some people you can’t ask out.”

 

“Dex, don’t be a pussy. Write her a letter. Text her. Email her. After all, this is the nineties.”

 

“Write them a letter. Of course you’d suggest that. Nurse, you don’t under—“

 

“Just tell them how you feel!” He was getting impassioned, and probably gesturing, judging by the squeaking of the mattress in the top bunk.

 

“I don’t KNOW how I feel! I’ve never felt like this before! I don’t want to spring a whole mess of whatever, that I can’t even describe right now, onto someone who wouldn’t even—” Will took a breath and failed to regain composure, as he had been born without it. “I have to figure some shit out first,” he said more quietly. 

 

The silence went on for a while, during which Will physically braced himself for more unsolicited advice. What eventually floated down from the top bunk was uncharacteristically sympathetic in tone.

 

“Sounds complicated.”

 

“Jesus, Nurse.” Will punched the pillow and thrust his head down on it with an air of finality. “You don’t know the half of it.” 

 

* * *

 

Derek comes back from the library around midnight, and Will thinks he’s gotten away with it. His teammate’s irregular studying habits means he often has incredible focus, to compensate for week-long periods of doing absolutely no assignments whatsoever. His head is probably full of verbs or whatever it is English majors think about. He’s probably forgotten all about it.

 

“Write that letter yet?” Derek asked, trying to swing himself up to the top bunk without using the ladder.

 

“What lett— oh. No,” he replied, thinking of the seven crumpled up drafts at the bottom of his backpack.

 

“Did you at least get any closer to figuring out how you feel?” This came out sounding serious, but that was only because Derek was concentrating on fishing coins from deep in the pockets of his jeans. He then removed the jeans from his body and dropped them unceremoniously on to the floor, knocking three paperbacks and a watch off Wills nightstand.

 

“I think I know how I feel, it just changes every thirty seconds. Half of the time I want to punch them in the face.”

 

“What?!” said Derek, sounding genuinely concerned.

 

“You. Punch you in the face. For asking me all these stupid questions.”

 

“Oh.” Once again a face appeared upside down over the side of the bed. It had an expression of genuine concern. “I don’t think you should ask Zelda out if you want to hit her. That’s domestic violence. You should hit _on_ her, not hit her.”

 

“I think it would be assault technically, if we weren’t in a relationship. Anyway, if she doesn’t want me to hit her she should stop being so annoying.”

 

“Seriously Dex, that’s abuse. It’s not funny.”

 

“Oh, so you can knock a guys jaw out in a game, but I can’t make a fucking joke?”

 

“That’s— hockey is different, what the hell are you— would you seriously hit a girl, Dex? What the fuck do they teach you in Maine?”

 

“Of course I would not hit a girl! There is no girl!” Will practically screamed. It was with great self-restraint and dignity that he resisted kicking the wooden slats of the bunk above him. He clenched both fists in the comforter and spoke to the bookcase. 

 

“Look. Sometimes I get angry. I get too angry. And that’s why I shouldn’t ask them out, I’m just no good for — for anyone.”

 

The head disappeared from the side of the bunk. Judging by the loud and uncomfortable silence, it appeared to be thinking quite hard.

 

“Dex. Did you mean there’s no girl, or there’s no _girl_?”

 

This was bound to happen eventually. Will swore off alcohol, swore off drinking games, and swore off ever talking about anything personal to anyone ever again, especially to Nursey. 

 

“I meant shut up. And go to sleep.” he said, trying to sound firm. “It’s none of your fucking business,” he added. 

 

“It’s late, we’ll talk about it later,” Derek said softly.

 

_How about in two million years,_ Will didn’t say. 

 

* * *

 

The next evening, Will did not come up to the attic. Instead, Bitty walked in with too-short short-shorts and an anxious smile. 

 

“Gosh, I do not know how y’all stand the smell in here,” he said, scrolling through Instagram filters.

 

“Hey, Bits. Have you seen Poindexter?” Derek saw Bitty’s fingers still briefly before they resumed their swiping. 

 

“Will asked me if we could swap rooms for a night,” said Bitty carefully, not meeting Derek’s eyes. 

 

“Why?” 

 

“I don’t know, I didn’t ask. Did something happen?”

 

“No,” Derek said quickly, getting up from the desk and heading towards the door.

 

“Where are you going?” asked Bitty.

 

“Bathroom,” he lied. 

 

“My door has a lock, Nursey. He’s not going to let you in,” Bitty called down the stairs. “And I’d appreciate if you didn’t break my door down.”

 

Derek trudged back up the stairs and sat back down. 

 

* * *

 

“Hey. Can I ask you something? You don’t have to answer. I’ll try to be better about dropping it. I know I have trouble with boundaries sometimes,” Derek said in a deliberately calm voice. 

 

“Sometimes?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Nurse, you’re in my bunk right now.”

 

“Oh. Yeah.” He turned, and saw amused hazel eyes amongst an infinity of freckles. They were both lying on top of the comforter, and by coincidence were both wearing check shirts. Derek didn’t even remember buying this. That meant it probably belonged to Will, and he probably had more trouble with boundaries than he previously realised.

 

“We’re practically breathing the same air.” said Will. 

 

“Sorry. Do you want me to leave?” Will shook his head and looked up at the slats. He uncrossed his arms and they jostled against Derek’s. This bunkbed wasn’t built for two people. Or rather it was, but two people on top of each other, not side by side. 

 

“What was it you wanted to ask?”

 

“The other day, you said you knew how you felt about… Zelda. How do you feel? When you’re not angry?”

 

Will thought about this, trying not waste his energy on figuring out why Nursey would ask such a weird question. He eyed the loose threads hanging from the mattress in the top bunk and tried to answer honestly. 

 

“Frustrated. Antsy. Itchy. Like I’m on fire.”

 

“Sounds like you need a cold shower,” laughed Derek. He was promptly shoved to the floor. “Couldn’t resist. But hey, what do you like about them, if they make you feel like that?”

 

Will rolled to the edge of the bed and looked down at him with a flat expression.

 

“I don’t know. He’s insufferable.” he said. Derek held his gaze. _So it is a guy then._

 

“Is he good looking, at least?” asked Derek.

 

“I’ll say,” said Will, turning Lamborghini red. He coughed. “Pretty attractive.”

 

Will rolled over, implicitly ending the conversation. Derek kicked his shoes off and climbed into the top bunk. He then fished out the yardstick he used to flick the lights off without getting out of bed. It took at least six minutes and was probably more trouble than it was worth. 

 

“About that other thing you said,” Derek started, against his better judgement. “When you said you’re no good for them. Cause you’re scared you’ll lash out, or whatever. Not to sound corny, but, I think everyone deserves to love and be loved. And that includes you, Will.”

 

Will heaved a deep, long-suffering sigh.

 

“That is corny. And no it doesn’t.”

 

“Yes, it does.” argued Derek.

 

“No it doesn’t.”

 

“Yes it does!” Derek exclaimed, hanging over the bunk.

 

“Yes it does,” said Will. 

 

“No it d- Fuck!”

 

“Answer me this, Nurse — why do you care so much?”

 

“Because! Because I care. Because you deserve to be happy like anyone else. Does that answer your question?”

 

“Not really,” said Will, as a falling yardstick knocked his alarm clock off the nightstand. 

 

* * *

 

A week passed without incident. No nagging, no more innocent questions, although Nursey did seem to casually scrutinise every male person Will talked to. If he was looking for somebody both incredibly attractive and insufferable, he needn’t look further than a mirror. 

 

As it was quiet, Will thought he might get away with indulging himself. Derek was in the top bunk, pen scratching furiously in his notebook. That might mask the sound, if he pulled his jeans zipper down really slowly. And when Nursey was close to a deadline, he tended to be distracted. The bedframe would only creak a little, he might not notice. 

 

Will slipped a hand under his waistband. The pen scratching stopped.

 

“Dex?”

 

“Fuck, what do you want?” 

 

“Jesus, don’t get your panties in a bunch.” Will quietly removed his hand from his panties. Uh, boxers. “I’m just saying,” Nursey continued. “You know no-one cares, right? That Zelda’s a guy.”

 

“No-one? You seem to care quite a lot.”

 

“I meant the team.”

 

“I,” Dex said, thinking of Bitty and his longing stares that everyone pretended not to notice. “I know they wouldn’t care.”

 

“Then what’s the problem? What’s stopping you from going for it?”

 

Will breathed in, air whistling through his gritted teeth. He counted to ten. 

 

“You know when you meet someone new, and they get your name wrong — but you don’t correct them immediately? So they think your name is something else, and it’d be too rude to correct them, so you let it go on and on, and eventually it’s too late and you can never say anything? You see them every day, so it’d be too weird. It’s just too late.”

 

“You can’t ask him out because he doesn’t know your name?” 

 

Exasperated, Will reached behind his neck and yanked his shirt off over his head. He balled it up and threw it at the wall.

 

“Oh my god. No, Nurse, he knows my fucking name! He just has no idea that I would ever feel that way about him. Because its ridiculous. He’s out of my league anyway.”

 

“Dude, there is no league! It’s all in your stupid ginger head! Just talk to him, get to know him, and then if he likes you—“ The rest of this was cut off by Will groaning loudly. 

 

“Listen, it’s like a different… dynamic.” said Will.

 

“Like a power dynamic? Shit, Dex, is he a teacher?” There was a thump as both of Nursey’s feet hit the wooden floor. Despite Will’s half-nude protesting, he managed to climb into the bottom bunk. “Is he a COACH?!” 

 

“Ugh, NO!” Will tried to grab Derek’s hands, which were currently shaking him by the shoulders. He kicked his legs out and hit hairy shin. 

 

“If you’re crushing on Coach Hall, I change my mind, don’t go for it. Or,” he said, pinching Will at the waist and leaning away as Will tried to poke Derek’s eyes out, “Do hit on him, but make sure Ransom and Holster are around to film it.”

 

“All I _meant_ was,” Will said breathlessly, struggling to keep Derek in a headlock, “he’s more experienced than I am.” 

“That’s not a problem. You know what Shitty always says,” said Nursey. Will released him so he could rub the sweat from his own forehead. 

 

“Use protection?”

 

“No—“

 

“Dolphins are evil?” 

 

“Well, he does say that, but—“

 

“Misunderstanding of feminist politics reflects the reality that most folks learn about feminism from patriarchal mass media?”

 

“Poindexter, shut up! I’m talking about ‘open and honest communication’.” Derek gestured so widely that his hand smacked against Will’s bare torso. Will felt giddy all of a sudden, and breathless, as if he had been the one caught in a headlock. 

 

“Et-gay out-way of my ed-bay. How’s that for communication?”

 

“Et-gay, you say?” 

 

Will flicked him on cheek and shoved him to the floor, grinning.

 

* * *

 

Six hours later, they were back in their own bunks. Will was grateful for it. Some things were easier to say to the underside of a mattress than to a person’s face. Especially this.

 

“Hey. Nursey. You know I— Well, we’ve always… Okay, let me start over.” There was no response, which Will was even more grateful for. Perhaps he was asleep and all of this would fall on deaf ears. It would still be embarrassing, but not quite as embarrassing.

 

“We’re… really different. I mean everyone’s different. But you make me think about things, in new ways, that I wouldn’t otherwise, because we’re like opposites. And that used to really suck, for me anyway. But now I, I like it. I’m glad.”

 

“You know what they say,” mumbled a sleepy voice from above. “Opposites attract.”

 

“Yeah,” Will said, and huffed air out his nose. “That’s kind of what I’m saying.”

 

There was a long silence. He waited. He considered disemboweling himself and also asking some guys from the team to hang, draw and quarter him. They could get a horse, couldn’t they? 

 

“Hang on,” Nursey said, sounding more awake. “I’m going down.”

 

The particular combination of words _going down_ threw Will’s mind off track for a hot minute and before he knew it another body was pushing into his bed. Nursey had hot feet and cold hands, because he just had to be weird and different, and his spearmint breath ghosted over Will’s face.

 

“So?” Nursey whispered. His face was too close for Will to look anywhere but his eyes.

 

“So,” Dex swallowed. “Is that cool?” 

 

He couldn’t miss the way Nursey bit his lip, or how his eyes flitted down for a short second.

 

“It’s pretty cool,” he said. 

 

* * *

 

_This bed really wasn’t built for two hockey players,_ Will thought as he tried to rearrange both their limbs. He swung a leg over Nursey’s, and snaked an arm behind his head. 

 

“If we took my bunk down and put them side by side, it’d be like a double bed.” Nursey said, managing to inject a somewhat suggestive tone. He was probably wiggling his eyebrows.

  
“Would you be the big spoon or the little spoon?” 

 

“I’ll be big, and you be little.” Yeah, they were definitely wiggling. 

 

“Wrong. I’m actually a knife.”

 

Derek rolled on to his side and stole a loud kiss. 

 

“I’ll be careful, then.”

 

“Are you actually planning to move the bunks?” Will asked.

 

“Nah. I’m used to being on top.” He climbed on top of Will to prove his point, winding him in the process. 

 

“Ha-ha.” Dex smacked him on the ass and tried not to laugh. “Fuck, I can’t believe no-one’s been making those jokes.”

 

“We’re not allowed. It’s in the bylaws. I should fine you right now, just so you know.”

 

“I’ll write you an I.O.U.”

 

“I can think of another way you can pay me back.”

 

“Oh, can you? Does it involve tongues, by any chance?”

 

“It might do.”

 

It definitely, definitely did. Will had no regrets. 


End file.
